I'm Not History

Earlier tonight I rounded up the dogs, hooked up the sleigh,
and mushed my way down to the store for some seal meat
and whale fin. When I finally got back, I put the dogs away
and crawled back into my igloo, and dialed up my internet
connection only to find out that last nights football game was
watched by more people than any other show in US history.
They say the number was around 106 million. That doesn't
include me or Igluk in the igloo on the other side of the snow
drift. Then again, he may have been watching Bear Grylls
on OLN eating dead sheep testicles in the hills of Scotland.


(the above is pure fiction since I own no dogs or sleigh,
but I have to keep the people living south of Lackawanna NY
believing the myth)

Handjob

Oh Sarah.

It's one thing to write notes on your hand.
It's something else to actually cross one of
your notes out and write something else.

According to right-wing outsiders, that black
marker ink was later found on Levi's dick and
then discovered around Bristols mouth.

Talk amongst yourselves...

Oh When The Saints....

Peyton Manning. You played a good game.
However, all it took was one massive mistake
and you kissed your ass good-bye.

Vegas bookies are crying right now.

At 5:48PM I called the Saints to win
by 7+ points. I should have made a bet.

Thanks to HuffPost for the pic.

The Big Fucking Game 44

I guess I should post something, since I haven't done anything
since last Tuesday and the premier of LOST.

Look, it's Drew Brees. Quarterback for the
New Orleans Saints. The odds-makers are
saying Drew here is going to go for the air
attack against the Colts. Whether he does or
not, the bookies are still saying the Saints are
going to lose.

Peyton Manning. Indianapolis Colts. The only
thing I know about Indianapolis is that a fellow
named TREKKER is from there. Sister Kim
will know what I'm talking about. Vegas has
the Colts winning by 5+. I've decided not to
bet on the game.

I'll root for the Saints for what it's worth.

In other news, Anthony and his Sick Mind are
spending this Sunday looking at snow. It's
somewhere between 2 and 3 feet deep.
Strangely enough, up here in Canada,
you know, the land of sled dogs and igloos,
we have basically no snow. The poor buggers
in Vancouver hosting the Olympics are having
to truck snow in just so they can make the games
go ahead without problems.

Somebody stole Charlie Sheen's car and drove it
into a ditch. Somehow this was deemed newsworthy
so I'm just letting you know in case you've been
asleep for the last day or so.

The Teabaggers had their Teaparty down in TN
last night. My Sarah was the main attraction.
If you wanted to see her speak you had to pay
over $300 for a ticket. That's ridiculous. I wouldn't
pay $300 to hear anyone speak. Hell, I wouldn't
pay $300 to bend Sarah over the back of a couch
and give her a good thrumming.........ok, that's a lie.

The Big Fucking Game 44 starts around 6PM EST.

I'm going to Subway and get a 12" ham & turkey sub.
I always get it on regular white bread and have the
following toppings:
extra lettuce
pickles
hot peppers
some onions
salt & pepper
regular sub sauce

Did I ever mention I've never eaten a tomato?
I haven't.

Here's some more pics...
Teabagger assholes making their little kids look like idiots.
I feel sorry for her.

Yay! Obama.

All Ghillied Up!

Perfect.

LOST - The Final Season

The madness begins....

2 hours = dozens of questions.

In order to get your LOST on, I must encourage the
LOST fanatic to visit the following sites:

DarkUFO

This will give you all the videos and screencaps you could
possibly want. Their LOST forum is also a wealth of info.
This site is BIG, so make sure you take your time.

ALT.TV.LOST

Google Groups is invaluable. The people here raise questions
you never would have thought of, plus they throw in the
occasional link for extra viewing pleasure.


I have one theory about LOST.
Is the island itself a sort of prison for the smoke monster,
and the people who inhabit it, the prison guards?

Surf's Up

I find the end of this article a bit questionable...

The world needs a treaty to prevent cyber attacks becoming an all-out war, the head of the main UN communications and technology agency warned Saturday.

International Telecommunications Union secretary general Hamadoun Toure gave his warning at a World Economic Forum debate where experts said nations must now consider when a cyber attack becomes a declaration of war.

With attacks on Google from China a major talking point in Davos, Toure said the risk of a cyber conflict between two nations grows every year.

He proposed a treaty in which countries would engage not to make the first cyber strike against another nation.

"A cyber war would be worse than a tsunami -- a catastrophe," the UN official said, highlighting examples such as attacks on Estonia last year.

He proposed an international accord, adding: "The framework would look like a peace treaty before a war."

Countries should guarantee to protect their citizens and their right to access to information, promise not to harbour cyber terrorists and "should commit themselves not to attack another."

John Negroponte, former director of US intelligence, said intelligence agencies in the major powers would be the first to "express reservations" about such an accord.

Susan Collins, a US Republican senator who sits on several Senate military and home affairs committees, said the prospect of a cyber attack sparking a war is now being considered in the United States.

"If someone bombed the electric grid in our country and we saw the bombers coming in it would clearly be an act of war.

"If that same country uses sophisticated computers to knock out our electricity grid, I definitely think we are getting closer to saying it is an act of war," Collins said.

Craig Mundie, chief research and strategy officer for Microsoft, said "there are at least 10 countries in the world whose internet capability is sophisticated enough to carry out cyber attacks ... and they can make it appear to come from anywhere."

"The Internet is the biggest command and control center for every bad guy out there," he said.

The head of online security company McAfee told another Davos debate Friday that China, the United States, Russia, Israel and France are among 20 countries locked in a cyberspace arms race and gearing up for possible Internet hostilities.

Mundie and other experts have said there is a growing need to police the internet to clampdown on fraud, espionage and the spread of viruses.

"People don't understand the scale of criminal activity on the internet. Whether criminal, individual or nation states, the community is growing more sophisticated," the Microsoft executive said.

"We need a kind of World Health Organization for the Internet," he said.

"When there is a pandemic, it organizes the quarantine of cases. We are not allowed to organize the systematic quarantine of machines that are compromised."

He also called for a "driver's license" for internet users.

"If you want to drive a car you have to have a license to say that you are capable of driving a car, the car has to pass a test to say it is fit to drive and you have to have insurance."

Andre Kudelski, chairman of Kudelski Group, said that a new internet might have to be created forcing people to have two computers that cannot connect and pass on viruses. "One internet for secure operations and one internet for freedom."

The RAW Story

Logic Bomb

"What were all those people doing there in the first place?"

Paul Shirley - U.S. Basketball Player who plays for
Unicaja Malaga in the Spanish ACB.

This is already old news, but I think it's worth reading.

The column Paul Shirley wrote on Haiti can be found HERE

He used to write a blog at ESPN, but after his little
article at FlipCollective, ESPN cut ties with him.

"...obviously a major malfunction..."

24 Years ago today

Top 20 Concert Tours

The Top 20 Concert Tours ranks artists by average box office gross per city and includes the average ticket price for shows in North America. The previous week's ranking is in parentheses.

1. (1) Metallica; $1,279,679; $68.67.

2. (2) Miley Cyrus; $1,097,001; $69.05.

3. (3) AC/DC; $946,924; $73.63.

4. (New) Aventura; $767,582; $77.13....(who?)

5. (4) Trans-Siberian Orchestra; $649,230; $44.59.

6. (5) KISS; $594,875; $60.74.

7. (7) Jay-Z; $520,110; $58.22.

8. (8) Dane Cook; $488,248; $60.10.

9. (9) Star Wars: In Concert; $453,041; $56.13.

10. (10) Robin Williams; $413,378; $89.92.

11. (11) Leonard Cohen; $377,088; $97.47.

12. (12) Jeff Dunham; $376,938; $46.33.

13. (13) Bob Dylan; $310,975; $60.86.

14. (14) So You Think You Can Dance; $261,923; $51.86.

15. (17) Tiesto; $183,216; $54.29.

16. (16) Rob Thomas; $182,607; $52.29.

17. (18) Daughtry; $165,031; $38.81.

18. (20) Mannheim Steamroller; $141,432; $56.02.

19. (19) Jason Aldean; $140,120; $27.84.

20. (New) Zac Brown Band; $115,228; $30.05.

This Can't Be Real

Clear lens facial piercings.
I know the first thing you'll say is the placement of the
teeth are too low, but consider that these 'apparent' lense
contraptions are pushing the lips up, and not everyone has
perfectly aligned teeth.

If someone has further info on this, let us know.

Poltergone

Zelda Rubinstein
May 28, 1933 - January 27, 2010

Go into the light Zelda

iPad

Wow. Apple has made a big fucking iPod/iPhone.

iPad. Hmm. Not much thinking went into that name.

If they make a 12" version, will they call it a Maxi-Pad?

Apple iPad

MAXELL

Remember this ad?

It was for Maxell audio tapes.

I just seen this poster on eBay with a price of $299.99

I have the same poster, in a glass frame, the same size,
as the one for sale on eBay.

I'm not selling it.

The Countdown Begins

The Final Season

Feb 2, 2010 8PM

Every great story must come to an end.

The LOST Countdown Calendar

In 2 Weeks

At the beginning of the NFL season I used my highly
mathematical method of picking the Superbowl winner.

I picked the Dallas Cowboys.

Unfortunately they were eliminated in the divisional playoffs
by Brett Favre and the Minnesota Vikings. In a show of
spirit, Brett and the Vikings were eliminated last night by
the New Orleans Saints. Thanks Brett.

So it all comes down to February 7th, 2010.
Peyton Manning and the Indianapolis Colts
versus Drew Brees and The Saints.

Drew just turned 31 on Jan 15.
He was born in Texas.

Peyton is the old fella at 33.
Oddly enough, he was born in New Orleans.

Super Bowl XLIV (44) will be held in Miami at
the Sun Life Stadium.

As of the timing of this post, the Colts are favored by
4 points over the Saints according to Sports Illustrated.
Of course this will change over the next 2 weeks.
According to my Vegas Insider info, the Over/Under is
sitting at 56 right now. However, as one writer has noted,
expect some of the tide to turn:

Opinions will surely vary for the next two weeks and some of those early thoughts on the Saints
will be buried when people start feeling nostalgic and sentimental about the city of New Orleans.
Everyone has a soft spot for the city and their fans following the tragedies of Hurricane Katrina.

I might make a small wager on the game.
I have no favourite though.

The best things about the Super Bowl, according to me,
are the following:

1) The game will be broadcast on CBS and not FOX.

2) I won't have to look at that retarded fucking robot that's
meant to appeal to 7 year olds.

A Class By Themselves

Tonight was the global fundraiser on television for Haiti.
I can say with 95% certainty that every Canadian channel
was showing the event, at least all the stations I flicked through.

In the U.S. the line up of participants looked like this:

CBS
ABC
NBC
CW
FOX
TNT
Weather Channel
MSNBC
CNBC
CNN
HBO
Showtime
Major League Baseball Network
Style Network
E! Entertainment Network
ReelzChannel
TNT
Comedy Central
Oxygen
Soap Opera channel
Bravo
National Geographic Channel
Sleuth
G4
CMT
TV1
BET
MTV
MTV2
VH1
GMC
FUSE
Current
PBS
It's even streaming live on IMDb, Hulu and YouTube.



Did you see who was missing?

That's right.
FOX News Channel.

The land of Bill O'Reilly.
The land of Sean Hannity.
The land of Glenn Beck.

Let's not tap dance around the subject.
You know damn well that when this
little fundraiser was announced, the
powers that be at FOX put their white
hoods together and said in unison,
"We're not giving up 2 hours of
prime time for a bunch of dead ni**ers".

Bank on it.

Beer & Burgers

If you happen to live in South Beach, Miami and you have a
hankering for a Whopper and a Miller Lite, your prayers
may have just been answered.

Let The Bickering Begin

Governments have pledged nearly $1 billion in aid to Haiti, according to an Associated Press estimate, including $575 million from the European Union's 27 nations. Those promises include:

___

AUSTRALIA: $13.8 million in aid pledged.

AUSTRIA: $1.9 million to United Nations and international aid organizations.

BRAZIL: $19 million in aid pledged. Eighteen flights have delivered 200 tons of aid including food, water, tents, medicine, a hospital and medical equipment. Forty-six medical doctors and nurses have been sent, along with 50 firefighters who specialize in search and rescue using search dogs. Nearly 1,300 Brazilian U.N. peacekeepers are working in rescue operations.

BRITAIN: $33 million in aid. A 64-member search and rescue team is on the ground.

BRITISH VIRGIN ISLANDS: $80,000 in aid.

CAMBODIA: $50,000 in aid from the government; $10,000 from Cambodian Red Cross.

CANADA: $130 million in aid pledged. So far, Canadians have privately contributed more than $39 million and Ottawa will match those funds. Some 2,000 military personnel, including two warships.

CHAD: $500,000 in aid.

CHILE: 15 tons of food and medicine, search and rescue team, 20 doctors.

CHINA: $4.2 million in aid pledged. Deployed a 60-member rescue team to the island, including search and rescue specialists with sniffer dogs and monitoring equipment, medics, and seismological experts.

COLOMBIA: $900,000 in aid pledged through Colombian Red Cross. $1 million in food, water, tents and medical supplies sent. Colombia's air force has flown in more than 200 rescue and medical workers and 18 sniffer dogs.

CONGO: $2.5 million in aid.

COSTA RICA: Engineers, health workers, disaster experts.

CROATIA: $137,000 from the government and a similar amount donated from citizens to the Red Cross.

CUBA: 30 doctors.

CYPRUS: $141,000 in aid.

CZECH REPUBLIC: $1.1 million in aid pledged.

DENMARK: $13.30 million in aid.

DOMINICAN REPUBLIC: $11.4 million in aid.

ESTONIA: $355,000 in aid.

FINLAND: $5 million in aid. Aid groups collect $2 million in private donations. Finnish Red Cross and Finn Church Aid providing medical staff and supplies, shelter, provisions, and water.

FRANCE: $28.6 million in aid pledged, plus more than 500 personnel, especially rescue workers, and 61 tons (55 metric tons) of supplies. Dispatched Francis Garnier, a ship that specializes in humanitarian missions, and three military transport planes.

GERMANY: $14.28 million in aid pledged by government. $25.56 million donated by private citizens.

GREECE: 25 doctors and rescue workers, food aid and 23.5 tons of medical, surgical and pharmaceutical supplies.

GRENADA: $215,000 in aid.

GUATEMALA: Rescue team.

HUNGARY: $140,000 within an aid program coordinated by the EU, plus three medical teams and three search dogs.

ICELAND: Search and rescue team.

INDIA: $5 million in aid.

ISRAEL: Established field hospital, sent some 150 doctors and rescue workers and 10 tons (9 metric tons) of medical equipment.

ITALY: $8.14 million as part of $131.37 million in emergency aid from EU member states. Separately it is donating $2.57 million to international groups to help children in Haiti. A field hospital that can treat 150 patients a day has been airlifted in.

JAPAN: $5 million in aid, plus $330,000 in emergency supplies. One 24-member civilian medical team on the ground, sending 110-member military team of medical and other personnel via a Japanese C-130 transport plane.

LIBERIA: $50,000 in aid.

MEXICO: Rescue team.

NEW ZEALAND: $1.4 million in government funding for relief efforts plus $1.3 million collected by nongovernment groups.

NETHERLANDS: Public pledges $57 million in aid and the government has said it will match. Government sent two military ships to assist with reconstruction, and a plane with search-and-rescue teams and sniffer dogs.

NORWAY: $17.5 million in aid earmarked for the World Food Program, Doctors Without Borders, the Red Cross and other aid organizations. The country's Red Cross and other aid organizations have raised at least $6.4 million for the country. Norway's Red Cross has donated 100 hospital beds, medical equipment, an ambulance and tents that will house as many as 2,000 displaced Haitians.

PERU: Two planes with 50 tons of aid, mainly food; two field hospitals.

PORTUGAL: Around $860,000 from private donations. The government has sent a military transport plane with more than 20 emergency rescue workers and sniffer dogs, as well as medical equipment and water.

RUSSIA: Has sent 145 emergency workers, a mobile air hospital, doctors and five transport planes to deliver aid. Provided emergency psychological treatment.

SENEGAL: $1 million in aid. President Abdoulaye Wade has said he would give a region of Senegal to Haitians wishing to move to Africa. He argued that because Haiti was settled by African slaves they are owed a right of return. The eccentric proposal was met with criticism by many who say the government is not even able to house its own people.

SERBIA: $100,000 in aid.

SIERRA LEONE: $100,000 in aid. The government has also offered to send police, soldiers and medical teams.

SLOVENIA: $70,000 in aid, and has sent tents worth $98,000.

SOUTH AFRICA: $135,000 in aid, and has sent a search-and-rescue team and plans to send forensic experts to help identify bodies.

SOUTH KOREA: $10 million in aid from government, aid agencies, religious groups and business companies, plus relief workers.

SPAIN: $8.56 million in emergency aid disbursed, sending 450 troops, 50 doctors, technicians and specialists.

SRI LANKA: $25,000 in aid and 2,200 pounds (1,000 kilograms) of tea for the victims.

SWEDEN: $25.6 million to organizations working in Haiti, including the U.N. and E.U.

TAIWAN: $5 million in aid. Dispatched a team of 23 rescue personnel and 33 medical staff.

THAILAND: $120,000 in aid; 20,000 tons (18,000 metric tons) of rice.

TURKEY: $1 million in aid, and has sent 30 tons of relief supplies including 200 tents, 20 tons of food and 10 tons of medicine, 2 health screening vehicles, health ministry personnel and four rescue teams.

UNITED STATES: $130 million in aid, according to USAID. Has sent about 12,000 military personnel so far, 265 government medical personnel, 18 Navy and Coast Guard ships, 49 helicopters and seven cargo planes to assist in aid delivery, support and evacuations. Is managing operations at the Port-au-Prince airport.

VENEZUELA: 679 tons (616 metric tons) of food and 127 tons (116 metric tons) of equipment, including water purification systems, electrical generators and heavy equipment for moving rubble. 225,000 barrels of diesel fuel and gasoline is on its way, and the Venezuela-led Bolivarian Alternative trade bloc also sent two ships carrying 5,248 tons (4,761 metric tons) of food aid. Search and rescue team.

___

INTER-AMERICAN DEVELOPMENT BANK: $200 million pledged.

WORLD BANK: $100 million pledged.

WORLD FOOD PROGRAM: More than 250,000 ready-to-eat rations delivered. More than 10 million to arrive within the next week.

(Thanks to Yahoo for the info)

Ill

The flu bug has bit me.

Mine appears to be stomach oriented.

Today is day 3.

To know how I'm feeling, try this experiment:

1) Go to your kitchen sink

2) Turn on one of the water taps

3) Let it run for 7 seconds

4) Turn it off

That's what happens when I sit on the shitter.

Yes, I know. Pleasant.

I'll return eventually.

5 Days

I believed, that at some time there would be a disconnect between

hate and humanity, but those that infest FOX Nation have proven

me wrong time and time again.

I hoped that as the days went by and more images came to light,

the venom that saturates so many would start to level out and

be replaced with a drop of compassion. Those on the right proved

me wrong yet again.

Fuck them, was the reply. Not my problem.

Let them fix their own mess.

We've got a long way to go.

HAITI 48HRS **GRAPHIC**

Some 7000 people have already been buried in Haiti.

They used a bulldozer.

***********************************************************

Rush Limbaugh

"We've already donated to Haiti. It's called the U.S. Income Tax."

Here's hoping the next time Rush gets chest pains,

it registers 7.0 on the Richter Scale.

HAITI

All earthquake images courtesy of The Big Picture

******************************************************

Rush Limbaugh on his radio show January 13, 2010:

"This will play right into Obama's hands. Humanitarian, compassionate. They'll use this to, to burnish their, shall we say, credibility with the black community, the both light-skinned and dark-skinned black community in, in this country. It's made-to-order for him. That's why he couldn't wait to get out there, could not wait to get out there."

Rush. Fuck. You.

As for Pat Robertson.

You're just fucked.

Back in Black

So the big kerfuffle is this:
Repubs are saying that if they said what Harry Reid said,
they'd be crucified, at best, by the Dems and the media.

The Dems are saying that Trent Lott defending Strom Thurmond
is nowhere near the same thing that Harry said.

Here is something Strom Thurmond said:

I wanna tell you, ladies and gentlemen, that there's not enough troops in the army to force the Southern people to break down segregation and admit the nigger race into our theaters, into our swimming pools, into our homes, and into our churches.

Here is what Trent Lott said about his BFF Strom:

"I want to say this about my state: When Strom Thurmond ran for president, we voted for him. We're proud of it. And if the rest of the country had followed our lead, we wouldn't have had all these problems over all these years, either."

When Stromy ran for Prez in 1948, he ran on a pro-segregation platform.
For those who didn't excel in US history this basically means that if
Stromy had his way, people like Bill Cosby and Redd Foxx would be
riding at the back of the bus and drinking from seperate water fountains.

Hmm. I'm pretty sure Harry Reid didn't call Obama a
light-skinned nigger, but maybe I'm wrong.
Here is Harry's blurb:

In private conversations, Reid had remarked that Obama could win the Presidency because the country was ready to embrace a black presidential candidate, especially one such as Obama -- who he referred to as being "light-skinned" and "with no Negro dialect, unless he wanted to have one".

OK, so on the one hand we have Trent Lott endorsing a guy
who hated himself some niggers, then ended up having
sexy times with a black woman which resulted in Stromy
having himself a daughter whom he never publicly announced.
In Stromy's defence, if there is one, he supported the Voting
Rights Act and fought to make the birthday of Martin Luther
King Jr. a federal holiday. Plus he was the first US senator to
hire himself a black aide. You can spin those facts however
you like. Maybe he pushed for MLK day so he could just have
another day off, who knows.

On the other hand, we have Harry saying that the majority
of cracker eating white Americans wouldn't feel overly shocked
if they had a somewhat-less-than-dark US President.
Now I take exception to that, even if I'm not a cracker
eating white American. What's he trying to get at? That
as a white boy I'm more inclined to like the semi-tanned women?
Well let me tell you something Harry, here's a tiny look at
some black women I happen to find quite delicious:

Alicia Keys

Halle Berry

Tamron Hall

hmmm.....ok, never mind.

Harry wins.

...and if the bus is full and Alicia, Halle or Tamron need a seat,
well, my lap is always available. I'd also include my face, but
Sistah Kim will just give me an 'ick' and a thumbs down and call
me a pig-dog.

BREAKING NEWS.....sorta

Mark McGwire admits to using steroidzzzzzzzzzzzz......

Sarah Palin joins FOX Spewzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

New Hate

ebook

I'm already sick of this term.
I will never buy one of these.
This is for those people who
can't exist without holding a
cellphone in their hands and
texting meaningless drivel to
their equally retarded friends.

Some nitwits say this is the
'new' paperback. Not fucking
likely. This is nothing more
than a pathetic attempt at
saying "Ooooh, look at me,
I'm all techy now. I have an
ebook reader."

Paperback.
I have hundreds.
They usually are 300-500 pages
in length. Sometimes more. I
don't have to power it on. I don't
have to click buttons to read the
next page. I don't have to plug it
into the wall to recharge it. If I
took public transit (which I don't)
and mistakenly left it on a bus, I'd
be out roughly $8. The ebook knobs
would be weeping on the curb.

ebook
Hate it.

Ice Ice Baby

The following pics basically cover the area of that pink dot.
They say the ice on the water is already 8" thick.
This morning the temp outside was -15C when I woke up,
so the ice just keeps getting thicker.
Actually, with nothing but sun today and no wind, it wasn't
all that bad out by the lake.
The people who are die-hard ice fishers love this weather.

Gumby Has Died

GUMBY

World Record Bass

Manabu Kurita holds up a 22lb 4oz largemouth bass.
To those non-fishers out there, that's a big ass fish.
The IGFA report is here.

Mama Biden

Catherine Eugenia Finnegan Biden has died at the age of 92.

Joe Biden recalled how when his mother couldn't find a pair of cufflinks for him to wear to an eighth-grade dance, she fashioned a pair from nuts and bolts, which left him mortified.

"Now look, Joey, if anybody says anything to you about these nuts and bolts, you just look them right in the eye and say 'Don't you have a pair of these?'" she told him.

Matty's Losing It**

Everyone's favourite fedora model has his flashing police light
adorning his page this morning, along with big red letters
typed out in CAPS LOCK informing us that the WH has only
allowed 'ONE HOUR' of healthcare coverage.

GREAT SCOTT!!

2 things:
1) Clicking on the link takes you.....uh.... nowhere, except back
to the main Drudge Report page, and...

2) Haven't we had continuous healthcare coverage for the last
10 months? Perhaps I've been watching different channels.

(I think Matty is referring to c-span, but who watches that?)

**Matty has now updated his headline to include 'c-span' and
his link goes to his bff Andy Breitbart.